goodbye 2009.

Finally. It's 2010.

Let me just say that the year of 09 was definitely not so good to me. Yeah, it was the year I graduated, the year I started dating my mans (although we technically started dating two days before 2009)... and yeah that's pretty much all 2009 really did for me. I graduated during the time when the job market was sucking major donkey balls. I went through several odd jobs... only one of the jobs where I worked for a fashion magazine was actually decent. It was just too much to commute from philly to nyc with an unpaid internship. Justttt my luck.

The end of 2009 was probably the most bitter i have ever been. I was dealing with the whole transition of being back at home, having absolutely no freedom, only getting to see my friends if somebody could pick me up from my house, having no home church to go to, so on and so forth. I know i sound like a major complainer; one of those girls that you just don't want to be around because all they do is put themselves down. Well, yeah. haha I am one of those girls. too bad. so sad.

SO 2010! Yeah. I'm talking to you. PLEASE. PLEEEEEEAAAASEEEEEE be good to me this year. PLEASE LORD help this year be a good year. I know I'm a complainer and I say that I hate life all the time. BUT PLEASE! I pray that something right happens in my life. I'm not saying that I'm not thankful. I'm thankful to be alive. I'm thankful for all of the lessons that God wishes to teach me. I just really hope this year is a little easy on me. So that I can wake up and be happy for longer than 20 minutes. I guess it really comes down to my heart and what state it's in right now.

it starts and ends with God.





my broskie and i engulfed in one of God's many beauties.

a good day.

Today was a good day.

woke up around 2pm because i'm so used to the time in las vegas. thought it was 11am, but realized that i wasted an entire day sleeping it away. i wanted to go grab a good bowl of cheerios with some vanilla silk soy milk, but somebody ate all of the cereal... and the milk. not cool. so i was forced to eat my mother's nasty bran oatmeal. it was seriously foul.

i signed into gchat and was happy to see my man friend's name with that inviting green dot next to it. talked with him for a bit. got stressed out because other people got stressed out because i couldn't make a decision. fickle fickles. talked to one of my kids from lighthouse and that made me happy. still stressed out and bothered. but my loving boyfriend tells me that it's our one year and i should focus on that and only that today.

ahhhh. our one year. not only have i been the worst girlfriend in the history of girlfriends, but i am lucky to say that i have been dating my awesome man friend for a FULL year. this is nice. my jason is also nice. he surprised me with a delicious meal at the melting pot and made me laugh through all of my sadness. you're great.


i felt special today.

My insignificant little postgrad life.

I’ve always wanted to start up my own blog, but I never really knew what I wanted this blog to be about. Then I started asking myself questions. What do I write? What has happened in my life that’s worth talking about? What would be interesting without making it sound like I’m trying to make things interesting? Who am I in this big, big world? And then things start to get crazy. I begin to ask myself who would even care to read anything about my insignificant life? Who cares about this small post grad who has absolutely no credit to her name. Why do I even try? Why do I even write?

And then it hits me. Who cares about the things I write and how little I am in this world. I may not have a job, I may not know what my future holds, and I may not know who would even care to read about my life, but what I know is that this blog is mine. All mine. It’s that light at the end of the day. That one thing that gets me going through the day thinking, ”I can’t wait to go home and write in my blog.” Okay, maybe not to that extent, but this is something that is my very own. My precious, if you will. And my life may seem so dull to others, but at least I can look forward to THIS. And hopefully it will grow from there.

GRACE KELLY.



(i actually wrote this on November 11th using wordpress.com, but i switched to blogspot recently) :)