for me.

i find it funny.

i find it funny that whenever something goes right in my life, i immediately throw my hands up and profess my undying love to God. when something doesn't go right, i automatically shut myself down and tell God that I'm bitter, angry, pissed, want to punch a baby when it comes to Him. And then something good happens, and then i'm back to OHHHHH I LOVEEEE YOUUUU. it's a cycle. not a good one.

i realized that i need to delight in the Lord always. not only during those good days or good times. ALWAYS. yeah, i find it hard to delight in Him during the worst of times, but honestly, those are the times when i need Him the most. And this delight can't be forced. i need to fully enjoy delighting in the Lord. nam sayin'? I've been trying really hard to do this for the past few weeks and let me just tell ya that it's pretty hard. but if life was meant to be easy, then we wouldn't learn anything right?

also i decided a couple weeks ago that for the rest of lent, that i would give up saying these phrases: "I hate my life" "I hate myself" "I want to kill myself" "I want to die" or anything along those lines. So, if anybody reads this blog, please keep me accountable because for those of you who know me... i say these phrases A LOT.

and this entry is for me. if somebody comes across this blog and doesn't approve of my faith-- too bad. so sad. these are MY thoughts and MY blog. so goodbye to you. :)